


1,095 Days

by echoflowertea



Series: Living [8]
Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: F/F, F/M, Female Reader, Reader Is Not Frisk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-06
Updated: 2016-05-06
Packaged: 2018-06-06 11:41:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,872
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6752539
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/echoflowertea/pseuds/echoflowertea
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Toriel invites everyone over for a semi-formal dinner to celebrate a milestone. Nothing weird could possibly come out of this.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1,095 Days

**Author's Note:**

> this is probably my favorite chapter i've written so far ;)
> 
> i update this series **tuesdays and fridays**!
> 
> like my fics? you could always [leave me a tip](https://ko-fi.com/A258IM)!

**Tori** : You do not have to bring anything! I will take care of it all!

**Tori:** Well, I should not say that.

**Tori:** Perhaps some drinks.

**Tori** : Locques will want soda and you know I do not approve.

**Tori:** So it is possible his very cool friend will help him out! ;-)

Ugh, Toriel. You loved her, but she had this thing about firing off a series of texts instead of condensing everything down into a paragraph or two. Not to mention that she was up at four in the morning getting ready for school, which meant that she somehow thought it was a good idea to tell you all about this dinner party she was throwing.

You smiled into the pillow despite yourself. It was really exciting. It was your first big get-together in a long-ass time.

After work you stopped by the grocery store to grab a pack of soda. She was right. Locques was crazy about the stuff. It didn’t matter what kind; he was always so much happier with a can of it wrapped around his sticky fingers.

“Pfthaha! Hey! Fancy meeting you here!”

You turned at the sound of the familiar laugh. “Hey, Ro! How have you been?”

“Good, good!” They approached you with their basket on one wrist, armed with a charming smile and glint in their eyes. “Haven’t seen you around the boss’ place lately. What, you find someone else? You leaving us?”

“Nah. I could never replace you in a million years. But money’s tight right now, so the only time I can actually go out to eat is if Sans takes me. Which is fun at first, but then I get all awkward because I know I’ll eventually have to pay him back. And he has this thing about debts.”

Ro looked thoughtful. “Maybe if you word it the right way. See if that works.”

“Uh…like what?”

They snickered and shifted their weight, ignoring the excited whispers of some teenaged monster girls behind them. “Ask him out! Then when the bill comes, you just say that you got it. Better make it somewhere he’s unfamiliar with, too. That way he can’t persuade the waiter to give him it to him instead.”

“That’s a, um…interesting idea.” No fucking way in hell. “Thanks a lot, Ro!” Die! How could they even suggest something like that?!

The two of you chatted for a while. Ro said that they were in the process of recording a song that they’d mentioned to you before. Apparently it was so good that they’d cried twice while writing it. You were so amused by their passion when they went into their rants about this kind of stuff that you hadn’t noticed how much time passed.

“Shit, I gotta go.” You looked outside to see the sun already setting. “I’ve got a dinner party to get to, and the hostess will just kill me with kindness if I’m late.”

“Ahhh, one of those types. Well, it was good to see you! I’ve got some of my own stuff to do. I’m going to the roller rink to practice my moves. Grillby said he was thinking of letting me on skates during the lunch rush. But first I have to see if I’m up for it.”

“Good luck, Ro.”

After getting into your car you realized that maybe you should’ve invited them. They were still fairly new to the area, and Toriel wouldn’t have minded. They already knew Sans and it would be good if they expanded their friend circle. But you lost sight of them when they went around the corner, and you weren’t about to waste more time tracking them down before you had to get to the dinner.

Toriel’s home was about five minutes away from her school. Just a brisk walk, long enough that Sans complained whenever she had you go back and forth. He was such a baby.

She built the place from the ground up, and surprisingly it looked nothing like her old pad back in the Ruins. You had a feeling that it was because she was slowly learning to accept all that happened and was trying to move past the horrors she’d been through. You admired her for that.

It was private enough where the kids from her school could drop by any time they liked and not have any problems from neighbors for their rowdiness. A long driveway packed with cars told you that you were already late. You parked just off the curb and rushed to grab the twelve pack, slamming the door behind you and walking up the hill to her front door.

Toriel didn’t do very well with gardening. In front of her house there were some plots of soil that still had dead, withered seeds inside of it. Plants that never got to see the light of day or bloom. She tried her hardest, but she just couldn’t get them to grow.

But she had a real knack for everything else. Decorating her new place came with something both quaint and comforting.

You lifted the brass snail-shaped doorknocker and pounded it against the hard wood, the finality of it not making you as nervous as you expected.

The door swung open and you stared down at the person that came to greet you.

“Uh…hey there, Ebby.”

“You’re LATE,” he announced, holding a makeshift sword made of paper towel rolls. “You know what that means? You gotta walk the plank!”

“I didn’t know this was a themed dinner,” you scoffed, just trying to get on his nerves. You reached down and ruffled his hair, earning a disgusted noise as he clawed at you with his hook hand.

“Who is it, my child?”

“Some weirdo breaking the rules! Mom said no soda in the house!” Ebby crowed, running down the hallway. It took all of your willpower not to wish he would trip and fall on his own loose socks.

Toriel chuckled as she rounded the corner, looking ethereal as always. You extended the drinks to her. She was a lot stronger than you were and something like this wouldn’t even make her break a sweat. She lifted it from your hands with a single paw and balanced it while she turned heel, glancing at you over her shoulder.

“Come this way! Everyone is already in the dining room.”

You really were the last one to arrive, which meant that all the others guests anticipated your presence. Toriel brought the drinks to the kitchen so she could pour the kids a glass. You took your jacket off and slipped it onto the coatrack in the corner of the room, shoes going in the closet near the door.

Now it was time to take the plunge. Toriel texted you and said that tonight was special because it was your third year anniversary for being on the surface. Which meant that you were supposed to dress up for the occasion. You had on a dress that Alphys made you buy, something that looked cute on you in the dressing room. But wearing it around the house or admiring it in your closet was one thing. Parading around your friends in it was quite another.

Don’t do this, you reminded yourself, trying to straighten your shoulders back so you gave off the air of confidence you so desperately needed. They liked you. They wouldn’t judge.

As soon as you entered the dining room, Undyne let out a long, high-pitched whistle and Alphys snapped a picture.

“Are you fuc—frick—are you serious?!” You nearly shouted.

Toriel poked her head out of the doorway in the kitchen and shot you a dirty look. Whoops, that was a close one. She took things seriously with the kids in the house. You were really bad at censoring yourself.

When she retreated to finish her preparations, you mustered up the most murderous intent you could and directed it at the entire table.

Undyne started to sweat. “Y-You don’t scare me, punk! I’m not taking it back!!!!”

You inhaled and exhaled, regulating your breathing. It was meant to be a compliment. You should’ve been flattered. Instead, you became hyperaware of your body as you went toward the only empty seat at the table.

Right between Sans and Papyrus.

_Kill me_ , you thought.

You set your purse underneath the chair and Papyrus gazed at you, stars already in his sockets. “WOWIE, BESTIE. I DID NOT KNOW YOU OWNED SUCH A THING!!!”

“Yeah, it’s um…new.”

You glanced around the table and visibly relaxed. Whenever you put on dresses, you always felt like you’d overdone it somehow. But you were well within the dress code.

Alphys wore a number that you picked out from your last shopping trip, a striped bodycon dress and heels. Undyne had on a cashmere blazer and button down shirt. Holy fuck, her arms really wanted to bulge out of that and tear through it like paper. Her biceps flexed when she rammed her fingers on the tabletop, clearly on edge. She got like this when she was hungry. Pants-wise, your guess was slacks and some dress shoes.

And the skelebros? You weren’t sure what you expected from Sans, but a tuxedo t-shirt was probably the most you were going to get out of him. He was the biggest dork you knew. Papyrus looked more appropriate for the get-together. He had on a dress shirt, tie and slacks. It looked like Undyne was the one that picked his outfit, actually. Alphys was right; she had great fashion sense.

“WELL? Papyrus, say something else!” Undyne threatened. She reared back and must have tried to kick him under the table, but missed and hit you instead.

“OW!”

“SHIT, SORRY!”

Toriel entered the room and slammed the plate down onto the center of the table, brows furrowed and a vague threat lingering on her pursed lips. She turned her back, stole a glance at you to make sure you were still clammed up, and returned to grab the rest of it.

“I-I DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN?” Papyrus bounced his leg, his bones rattling with apprehension. “I COMPLIMENTED HER?”

“NGGAAAAHHHH! You’re hopeless!!! SANS?”

The older of the brothers just grinned at her in response. Her eye twitched and she let out a long groan.

The door to the hallway opened up and Ebby came darting toward you, gleeful laughter following after him. He and Fram rolled into the living room and started to wrestle. That got Undyne’s attention long enough that she no longer hounded after the guys on either side of you. Instead, she elected to jump up from her seat and act as their coach, flexing as she shouted words of encouragement at them.

“I AM GOING TO HELP TORIEL,” Papyrus announced, shooting up from the table.

The sheer force of it nearly knocked the entire thing over, but Alphys steadied it on her end with sweat beading at her brow. You grabbed the glasses that threatened to tip and he booked it out of the room. Undyne still caused a ruckus with the kids and you silently hoped that you could avoid breaking more of Toriel’s furniture this year.

“guess my bro’s gettin’ a little impatient.”

“Did he have lunch today?”

“he should’ve. why?”

“I dunno, I’ve never seen him this eager for a meal before. Maybe you should go and ask what’s eating him.”

Sans’ grin widened. “heh heh.”

“UGH.”

Alphys burst out laughing. When you both looked at her, she glanced up from her phone and blushed. “O-oh, sorry! I w-was reading this dissertation a-about, um…” She set it on the table and sank into her seat. “I-I was reading f-fanfiction.”

“Thank you for being honest.”

“yeah. good to know you’re not a _phony_.”

You poked him with a finger and told him to step up his game, but he continued to make bad after ridiculously bad pun.

This was complete chaos. From the kitchen you heard pots and pans dropping, Papyrus apologizing and the telltale shuffle of Toriel’s heavy steps across the linoleum. The kids continued to roughhouse, Undyne brought to passionate tears from their display. She was so proud of them for being as destructive as they could without going too far and resorting to malicious intent. Alphys cackled every now and then as she scanned the bright screen in front of her, her claws tapping away as she no doubt liveblogged her experiences in the dark side of whatever fandom she patrolled nowadays. Sans started to make farting noise to attract the kids’ attention on to him, which sent them into uproarious laughter and tickles rather than headlocks and scratching.

You drank in the scene. Whatever cozy atmosphere Toriel intended had been eased away by all of you. Were you really the only sane one here?

You sipped at your drink and made a face when you realized that Sans had dumped his own into it, combining the two to make some sort of thick, gooey concoction. Disgusting!

Despite all of the craziness, you noticed right away when Locques filed out from the hallway, rubbing at his eyes. He looked like he just woke up from a nap. Usually that meant he was going to be grumpy as hell. But after a few bleary moments, he spotted you and broke into a smile. He rushed over and clambered onto your lap without a word. You let out a quiet _oof_ when he settled between you and the table. It seemed like he had gotten a lot heavier with each passing week.

“G-good to see you, Locques!” Alphys greeted him, adjusting her glasses. She locked her phone screen so she could give him her undivided attention. “Y-you’ve gotten so big!”

He smiled at her and nodded. The both of them had a weird relationship because of everything that happened when you lived Underground. You had a sneaking feeling that she admired him for all he did, and he returned the favor. But the both of them were too awkward to admit it. Or even try to spend time together alone.

“What is going on out here?”                

Toriel came out from the kitchen and deposited the rest of the food on the table, the silverware following with a clatter. She squinted at the scene and crossed her arms.

One look at their mother and the kids all settled down. Fram and Ebby scampered over to their respective kids’ table. Daury, who you hadn’t even noticed, scrambled out from underneath the couch and into her seat. Locques kissed you on the cheek before you helped him off your lap, lowering him gently so his feet could reach the floor.

“wait a second there, kiddo. not fair she’s the only one who gets a goodbye.” Sans winked and tapped his cheekbone. “where’s mine?”

He pointed at you, then Sans, and put the tips of his fingers together.

“ _Locques,_ ” you hissed, earning a giggle from him as he zipped by.

Sans’ expression didn’t waver much, but you could see his pupils had constricted just the slightest. His hands tightened into fists and he withdrew them both into his lap.

“Don’t be such a wimp!” Undyne barked, snatching a ceramic plate from the stack on the table. Toriel shot her a look and she recoiled. “I-I mean…hey, he’s the one who started it!!! Why is everyone picking on me?!”

“If you cannot take it, then do not _dish it out_ ,” Toriel scolded her.

“Wha—THAT IS AWFUL! NGAAAHHHH!”

You all laughed as Papyrus marched into the room, holding a tray full of miniature platters for the kids. He didn’t ask what was so funny, as he was content in serving everyone. You watched him handle it with great care, stepping over the spilled toys and crayons all over the floor to approach them. They all banged their forks and spoons on the table, cheering him on, which would’ve been a lot more annoying if they weren’t made of plastic.

“HERE YOU ARE, YOUNGLINGS. ENOUGH FOOD FOR ALL. IF YOU ARE GOOD, YOU MAY FIND SOME DESSERT AS WELL! BUT DO NOT TELL TORIEL I SAID SO, IT IS A SECRET!!! AUDIBLE WINK!”

They all clamped their hands over their mouths and laughed, amused that he was practically shouting it across the entire room. Papyrus, pleased with himself, joined you at the table.

You handed him a plate and smiled at him, which he returned.

“Well? Dig in!” Toriel announced. You were really glad monsters weren’t all about saying grace before a meal, because you were starving.

As soon as everyone took a bite, there was a long chorus of satisfied hums across the dining room. The kids in particular weren’t ashamed of how much they loved everything, having gone completely silent while they stuffed their faces.

Alphys snapped a few pics of her plate to post on Undernet. She was going to filter the shit out of it, too.

“I am glad we could all be here,” Toriel beamed, gazing around at each of you. “It is a very special day. Another year has gone by and we have remained triumphant.”

You nodded and swallowed another bite of quiche. Fuck, this was incredible.

“So why were _you_ late, punk?” Undyne pointed her fork at you before ravenously taking another bite. “Don’t tell me you got lost again!”

“Nope, I ran into Ro at the grocery store when I was picking up soda.”

Alphys and Undyne immediately exchanged glances. Were they…actually communicating through eyebrow wiggles and blinks??? Toriel didn’t seem all too confused, which made you somewhat suspicious. You didn’t think you told her about them yet.

“WHO IS RO?”

You looked to Sans for help, but he pretended to be slicing up his food. Which was mashed potatoes. Ugh, why would he always put you in the spotlight?

“The new server at Grillby’s. I interviewed them for the position. Sans and I have met them before. They’re super cool.”

“SUPER COOL?” Papyrus echoed, visibly distressed. “NYEH HEH HEH…THEN WHY HAVE I NOT HEARD OF THEM?”

“Uh, I dunno. We’ve only hung out maybe like…once or twice? They wrote a song about me and asked me to listen to it.”

Undyne did a spit-take of her drink, thoroughly covering Papyrus in a fine mist. He didn’t even seem to notice it dribbling down his clothes. He was fixed on you with his browbones knitted. Alphys rapidly texted on her phone.

“THAT…DOES SOUND VERY COOL,” he admitted. “WHAT WAS THE SONG ABOUT?”

“Hmm…I don’t remember all of it. I think they mentioned something about my ‘SOUL beat’?”

The table went dead fucking silent.

Until Undyne laughed. She hooted and guffawed so hard that she had tears spring to her eye(s). She banged her fist against the table and nearly smashed her side in half with the sheer force of it. Alphys’ face turned completely red and she looked like she wanted to pass out. The last time she got like this was when you showed her some raunchy fanart you found of Miku and Hana from that shoujo anime all that time ago.

And Toriel? Toriel was with Undyne. Except she sounded like she was trying to say something between hearty chuckles.

You poked at your food, not really feeling your appetite any longer.

The skelebros didn’t look so hot. Sans had a hand on his cheekbone and gazed at Alphys accusingly. Papyrus fumbled with his hands and eventually buried his face in them. He maneuvered his body away from yours.

“Uh…I don’t get it,” you admitted, voice drowned out by the other two just losing their fucking minds. “But I’m guessing it’s something related to monster culture.”

“Oh,” Toriel snorted, hands shaking so bad she couldn’t even grab her spoon. “That reminds me! Did you know that our friend here came to my office to ask me about dating?”

“TORIEL!”

You told her that in confidence! Ooh, she was the _worst_ at keeping this shit to herself! Unless you explicitly made her promise not to reveal things to everyone, she would do it! And she was so brutally honest that she didn’t realize how embarrassing it was! Or maybe she did and this was what actually made her happy! Was Toriel that sadistic?

“HAHAHA! No way!!! What did she ask about? What did she say?”

Undyne tried to kick Papyrus under the table and got you in the kneecaps _again_. You shot her a glare, which she absolutely ignored, fully engaged in the hostess’ story.

“She wanted to know if monsters only dated within their kind!”

Sans spared a glance at you. You pretended not to see it, the room suddenly hot and heavy. Whew. It was stifling in here. Why did you wear this dress again? You dug your heel into the carpet and fidgeted, a nervous clench of your stomach telling you that this was really happening.

“I thought perhaps she had a crush on someone, but she said that she was worried about you and Alphys!”

“What.” Undyne’s jaw dropped.

“ _What?_ ” Alphys squeaked.

Toriel continued, not realizing how downright uncomfortable they were with the conversation shifting toward them. “Yes! She went on about how she hadn’t seen monsters of two kinds having children together. We went into a long discussion about how monsters can have children with any partner they choose, regardless of what family they are from. Of course, I am not sure why she wanted to know. Maybe she was thinking that you two would have problems in starting a family together?”

_End it. Just slaughter me right here. Carve me up on the table with your spears, Undyne._  You deserved it. At least you would die with some dignity intact. You tried to get her attention to ask her this favor. Assisted suicide sounded pretty good right now.

“W-why were you asking a-about us having children?” Alphys regarded you with the same level of bewilderment as the time when you found that moldy piece of pocky underneath her bed.

You smiled shakily. Why didn’t you just bring a shovel with you to dinner? Then you could’ve just continued to help dig yourself into a hole. “I…I don’t know? Originally I just wanted to make sure that your guys’ relationship wasn’t going to be…targeted by other monsters? I mean I lived there for years and never saw anyone quite like you.”

“Uh…Guard 01 and Guard 02???” Undyne suggested, the tips of her fins still bright blue. “What the heck did you think? Everyone just dates in their own families???”

“Sorry! I was trying to look out for you!” Lie. “And anyway, I was only wondering because I want you guys to be happy and I was willing to fight for your relationship!” Half-lie.

Toriel blinked. “Do not forget about the part where you asked about monsters and sexual attraction!”

This was it. You were done. You could only take so much abuse before you crumpled. “I-I never said that,” you stammered, your voice growing smaller by the second.

“Forgive me. It was about romance, mostly. She wanted to know how easily it is for monsters to fall in love, and how long it usually lasts. That was how we discussed more about you two!” She beamed, eating away without a care in the world. “She was curious to know how long you two were planning to be together! If perhaps you were willing to bond through marriage any time soon!”

“M-m-ma-marriage?!”

Alphys passed out.

Undyne groaned and picked her girlfriend up from the plate she fell face flat in, the food staining her face and smearing across her glasses. You tossed your head back and prayed to whatever essence of a benevolent being that existed out there that they would just let this hellish nightmare end.

You sank into your seat, giving up on your food entirely.

Sans grinned at you. “uh. wow. i had no idea you were so interested in this kinda thing.”

“YOU COULD HAVE ASKED ME,” Papyrus suggested, looking a bit miffed you hadn’t. “I KNOW ALL ABOUT MONSTER STUFF!”

“I-I know Paps, but this was sort of personal.”

“WE’RE NOT ALLOWED TO TALK ABOUT PERSONAL THINGS?”

“It was like…girl talk. I wanted Toriel to give me her perspective.” Your tongue felt like bubblegum in your mouth.

“OH. SO YOU DID NOT TRUST ME BECAUSE YOU WERE EMBARRASSED?”

“N-No, I wasn’t…”

“BUT YOU _ARE_ EMBARRASSED.”

You put your hands over your face and protested behind your fingers. “I am not!”

“I CAN CLEARLY SEE YOU LYING? IS THIS THE END OF OUR FRIENDSHIP?”

Undyne managed to use the drink concoction Sans made for you as a smelling salt. Alphys sat up with a sharp gasp, her pupils dilated. Her big, buff girlfriend held her over the chair and fanned her with a napkin on the table. This entire scene was so fucked up.

“No! No, it’s not like that at all!”

“I’M NOT SURE I CAN BE BESTIES WITH A PERSON WHO IS BEING DECEPTIVE? IT IS NOT FAIR TO EITHER OF US! WE ARE BETTER THAN THAT! I TOLD YOU MY SECRET ABOUT THE PASTA SAUCE!!! HOW MUCH DO I REALLY KNOW ABOUT YOU???”

“Papyrus, listen to me!” You turned toward him and gripped his hands, pulling them toward you. He still went on and on about how he felt cheated and betrayed. How did this escalate so quickly?! “I hadn’t seen Toriel in a long time and I wanted her to tell me straight up! I love that you would willingly share monster culture with me, but I needed an excuse to see her!” Quarter…lie?

Sans finally lost it. He laughed. He put his head down on the table, his shoulders visibly shaking with each one that wracked his body. You released Papyrus’ hands and he seemed perfectly okay with your confession, returning to normal so he could finish his food.

“Why are you so amused?” Toriel asked Sans, pouring him another glass. “You did the same thing.”

Whoa. Whoa, whoa, whoa.

He froze, but still spoke with his teeth against the tablecloth. “tori.”

“Hold up.” He wasn’t getting away with this. “Sans was asking you about monster relationships?”

Ouch. That hurt more than you thought it would. A million thoughts ran across your mind. Who were they? Did you know them? How could you have missed this? When did they have the time to build up this friendship bordering on romance? Did you seriously lose your fucking chance because of your own insecurities?

“Oh, no.” She hummed happily, standing up to clear the dishes off the table. “He was asking about humans.”

“FUFUFUFUFU!”

“O-oh my god? That is so adorable???” Alphys paused from trying to scrape off the crusted remains of the…incident off her dress. “Tell us more!”

Toriel disappeared into the kitchen just long enough where you questioned whether she would be back. Your heartbeat was out of control. Your palms were sweaty and you felt a little nauseous.

She returned with dessert, a huge bowl of ice cream and various toppings to set in the middle.

“Hmm, where should I begin? Sans asked very similar questions. He wanted to know if humans only date other humans.”

Alphys and Undyne gazed at each other.

“D-Definitely not,” Alphys spoke confidently, a wry smile on her face. “There have b-been plenty of monsters dating humans at the university! In fact, th-there’s even this speed dating service where they can mingle together! Mixers a-and all sorts of things! Sans, if you’re interested, I-I can totally get you in one!”

You…had no idea that even existed. Good for them.

“He wanted to know what humans do if they don’t share—”

Toriel shot up as soon as she heard one of the children crying. It was Daury. Apparently she’d tried to use healing magic on Ebby and couldn’t get his cut to close. Now the both of them were upset and trying to console each other through snot and tears.

With her out of the picture, Sans piled on a huge slop of ice cream onto Alphys and Undyne’s plate, looming over them almost menacingly.

“eat up,” he threatened, the gooey mixture dripping from the serving spoon as his grin tightened.

Both of them choked back any more comments and did as he asked.

“HOW THOUGHTFUL OF YOU, SANS!”

“what can i say? i’m _an ice guy_.”

How Sans could make a pun seem ominous was anybody’s guess.

The kids were fine. Toriel cured everyone’s tears with a bit of healing magic and some ice cream. You stole a glance at them and grinned. They were going to be a complete mess tonight. Sticky cream all over their mouths and fingers. Somehow you had a feeling that Toriel wanted them to enjoy breaking her strict rules just for one night.

You took your own bowl of ice cream and started in on it, pacing yourself. It helped to calm your nerves. Now that the questioning was over with, you could finally enjoy her food.

“Ah, damn it.”

You looked down your shirt and tried to fish out the chunk that fell down your cleavage. Cold! Alphys stared at you from across the table as you grabbed a napkin and started to dig inside your bra to get it all out.

“I-I’ve been wondering something. I-I mean I think I have a good idea, but, um…i-is it true that some humans find b-breasts sexually arousing?”

She was really doing this to you. In front of everyone. You stopped what you were doing and released your grip on the crumpled napkin, not bothering to lift your head to maintain eye contact with her. You just gazed at her from beneath your brows.

“Aly. You _know_ the answer to that question. You’re a scientist.”

“M-most of my r-research is focused on the purely a-anatomical facet of biology! I study organs a-and magic, not the s-sexual practices of humans!” She looked disappointed. “I-if you don’t want to tell me, that’s fine! I just…I t-trust you more than a lot of stuff I’ve been reading on the Internet a-and, um…I don’t want to be taken advantage of if I’m m-missing some sort of big joke!”

You were just glad that Toriel was still checking up on everyone and away from the adult table. Who knew what kind of shit she would drag out to share like it was some kind of small talk.

“Yeah, I mean, a lot do. Not all humans, but enough that people with breasts have to cover them up in public.”

“W-what? No way.” Alphys thought long and hard. “I-I don’t understand the appeal? I-I mean!!! Yours are r-really nice and th-they’re a part of you so of c-course I like them, but w-what’s the obsession about?”

“OOH, I KNOW THIS ONE. THEY ARE VERY WARM.”

“they’re soft. plus they jiggle.”

“HA, HA, YES!!! THEY ARE LIKE LITTLE PILLOWS.”

“not to mention most humans get aroused when they’re touched.”

“OR IF SOMEONE PUTS THEIR…MOUTH…”

You put your spoon in your bowl and tried to make yourself look as small as possible. How many times were you going to cover your face today? The answer was a mystery.

“How do you guys even KNOW that?” Undyne cackled, sharpened teeth clenching together in a wide grin.

Toriel came up to the table and everyone nearly jumped out of their skin. She didn’t bother asking what you were discussing.

“The children are asking that we go outside to enjoy the weather. Is everyone finished?”

You couldn’t spring up fast enough. “Um, yeah. Let me just grab these and put them in the dishwasher.”

You leaned over to collect as many bowls as you could. Despite all of your gossiping, the ice cream was mostly gone, save for a questionable soup at the bottom of the main dish. You knocked over someone’s drink with your chest and the remaining liquid spread across the tablecloth, causing you to freeze.

“Tori, I am so sorry. I’ll go load this into the washer.”

She laughed and steered you away from the massive mess you made. “Do not worry. The children have not exactly been very careful tonight, either. We will deal with it later when they are in bed.”

She succeeded in reassuring you. You quickly darted in the kitchen to drop off what you did manage to pick up and promised yourself that you wouldn’t leave until you helped her pick the place up. You had the day off tomorrow, anyway.

“I have some candles I would like you to light outside.” She handed them to you. “I will make the children wash up just a bit before they go rolling around.”

Seemed easy enough. She made sure to send some matches with you, as she knew you didn’t have conveniently awesome fire magic like she could summon.

Everyone else was already waiting just outside the back door. Man, it was so nice out here. Warm enough that you didn’t get the shivers, but cool enough that you didn’t need to grab a jacket.

“Hey, guys. Think you can help me out?”

Alphys and Undyne didn’t seem to hear you. Both of them were huddled along Alphys’ tablet, and you could hear the familiar sound of an anime intro. Oh. They must’ve just caught the beginning of a new episode and were streaming it.

“WHAT IS IT YOU NEED, BESTIE?”

“I’ve got to set these up. And I think we can light up some of those tiki torches to keep the bugs away, too.” Smoke was good for sending mosquitoes back to whatever hell they came from. Sans and Papyrus didn’t have to worry so much about them, but they did like to bite the rest of you, even if they couldn’t exactly draw blood from the monster girls.

Each of them took a couple and went off to spread them around. Papyrus was tall enough that he took care of the torches, whereas Sans placed the majority of them in actually decent spots. Some of them he did put out to cause his younger brother to panic, like the couple he somehow got on the roof of the house and the other that he balanced on top of his own head.

You sucked in a breath and drank in the scenery. A long stretch of land, about two acres all to herself, with massive trees that lined either side. She had a small pond in the distance where swans and geese often stopped by. Just off from the house was a playground she built for her kids. It was one of those cool ones, too, not the lame-ass structures they had at most schools. A see-saw, swing sets, tunnel slide, monkey bars, hand glider. She even built a tire swing not too far off. The good stuff.

“Thank you so much,” Toriel cooed, the children swarming around her as she stepped out. The flames danced across her fur and brought out the warmth to her eyes. “There you are. Have fun!”

Locques darted off for the sandbox with Ebby, the both of them apparently having buried some kind of treasure there earlier in the day. Fram and Daury approached you with a pout.

“We wanna play hide and seek!”

“Um, okay. Sure.”

“You’re it!”

Brats! You sucked in a breath and closed your eyes, beginning your count to twenty.

It didn’t take you very long to find them. You knew their favorite spots, plus Locques was a true bro and managed to point out where they were so you weren’t wandering aimlessly forever.

You made Daury “it” next. You immediately knew where you would go. The most obvious spot and the one she would never check: the slide.

Before you slipped in, you stole a glance at the porch. Toriel sat on her rocking chair, reading some kind of trashy romance novel by the torches. Alphys and Undyne were still so fixated on their anime that the rest of you could’ve just left them there all night and they wouldn’t have noticed. You didn’t see the skelebros, but something told you they were being adorable as always.

So here you were. In the slide. Cuddled up and regulating your breathing so she wouldn’t be able to hear you. You didn’t catch anything but the gentle whistling of the wind just outside the plastic. No delicate crunch of the sand surrounding you or the creaking wood as someone clambered up the side to peek in.

“heya.”

You screamed internally. He did this just to annoy you. He knew that you were trying to win in this game against children.

Sans clambered inside from the bottom, slipping a few times, but eventually settling right near your feet. “thought you might need some company.”

“You’re going to get me caught, that’s what you’re gonna do.”

“aw. hurts my feelings when i’m not appreciated.”

You snorted and resisted the urge to push him all the way back down the slide. “Okay, Sansy. You got me. I was totally lonely in here and wished I had a big, strong monster to protect me.”

“see? that wasn’t so hard.”

You curled up as best you could, trying to give him more space. “I can’t believe it’s been three years.”

“yeah. me neither.”

“I’m really glad I met all of you.”

He spared a glance at you. “you gonna get mushy, too?”

“I’m allowed to be nostalgic. I never thought that when I fell Underground I would find someone as great as you, let alone consider them one of my best friends.”

“y’know. i feel the same.”

You let out a dramatic gasp. “Now who’s being mushy? If we weren’t cramped in here, I would hug you.”

“really?”

“Yeah.”

“ok. you owe me one before you leave.”

“Deal.”

You were content to sit in silence together. Sans looked like he was ready for bed, but still hung on just long enough to entertain you. A few times he almost started slipping, but you grabbed his hand and tugged him upward so he wouldn’t make it to the bottom. Eventually he found a position where his shoulders touched the top of the tunnel so he was anchored.

“HELLO? ARE YOU BOTH IN HERE?”

You beamed up at the opening. “Paps! Come join us!”

He went feet first, careful not to nudge you from your positions. His body was so much bigger in this tiny ass slide, so he had to hunch over to fit his broad shoulders in. “WOWIE. THIS IS NEAT! IT SMELLS A LITTLE FUNNY, BUT I CAN SEE WHY YOU’VE CHOSEN THIS AS YOUR HIDING SPOT!”

“Now it’s the _ultimate_ spot, because it has two of my favorite things in it.”

“NYEH HEH HEH! THANK YOU, BESTIE!”

“wow. is your name feta?”

“SANS, STOP THIS IMMEDIATELY.”

“’cuz you’re so _cheesy_.”

“MOMENT RUINED!!!”

You gigglesnorted.

“OH, THIS REMINDS ME OF THE TIME WHEN YOU GOT LOST IN WATERFALL.”

“Ew, I forgot all about that. I’m glad you came to save me, Paps, I would’ve been a goner.”

“I ALWAYS CARRY MY MTT BRAND FLASHLIGHT FOR EXACTLY THAT REASON!”

“yeah. not ‘cuz you’re afraid of the dark.”

“I’M GLAD WE UNDERSTAND EACH OTHER.”

It was actually pretty comfortable in here. Enough that you weren’t feeling cramped or claustrophobic. “Ooh, I’ve gone one. What about when the time when Sans dropped his cinnabunny into the snow outside the house and he—”

“no.”

“No, Sans, it’s hilarious! Hey, get your hands off me!” You shooed him away, not liking how flustered his close proximity made you.

“we agreed to never talk about this.”

Papyrus’ eyes turned to stars. It was over now. He loved sharing secrets. “WHAT? I WANT TO KNOW!!!”

“He ate it anyway even though—”

“RELEASE HER AT ONCE! THIS IS A COMPELLING STORY!”

“if you say it, i’m telling papyrus something about you.”

“Heateiteventhoughitwasbrownandsaiditwasthecinnamonsugarbutwebothknewitwascoveredinmudorsomethingelse!” You gasped.

“OH MY GOD. SANS. THAT IS DISGUSTING.”

“last year when she was making your birthday cake she licked the batter off the mixing spoon and accidentally stuck it back in.”

Papyrus screeched. “THIS IS HORRIBLE? I DON’T WANT TO HEAR ANY MORE!!!”

All three of you burst into laughter, the sound reverberating against the slide’s walls. You gazed at both of them affectionately. They looked so relaxed. So happy. If this was what you got from them instead of a romantic relationship, then you would be totally okay with it after all. It would suck a little, sure, but this meant just as much to you. Trusting you enough to let loose and share embarrassing stories, bonding with brothers who’d been through hell.

“I found ‘em, Ebby!”

“Get outta there! You’ve been caught!”

The kids tapped Papyrus’ back. He tried to turn around to congratulate them on their success, but was rammed so tight in the slide that he couldn’t. You heard them both giggle as he panicked.

“I AM STUCK!”

“It’s okay, Paps. We’ll go down the slide and then you can come after us.” You nudged Sans with your foot. “Go!”

Sans let out a grunt and struggled a bit. After a few agonizing seconds, he turned toward you with a pained grin.

“uh. bad news, everybody.”

“NOOOO!” Papyrus howled, wiggling around hard. He tried to dislodge himself and only ended up kicking you in the back. You let out a small noise of discomfort and that set him off even more, thrashing just enough to where he wasn’t hitting you, but clearly putting on quite a show for the hysterical kids just outside the slide.

“Stop! Stop! It’s okay. We can get out. Just give Papyrus a push! Ebby, you’re the strongest!”

“You got it, matey!” Ugh, he was still playing the pirate shtick. Well, you couldn’t say he wasn’t committed.

He must have gone with a running start, because all five of you went toppling out in a flurry of tangled limbs.

You crashed down hard, grateful for the briefest moment that Toriel went with sand instead of wood chips. Sure, it went up your underwear and your legs were splayed in a very unladylike position, but hey. You had to be optimistic about something. Probably the worst part was that you were lodged underneath Papyrus and on top of Sans, the both of them dead silent and completely still from the shock of being shoved through the slide.

Papyrus lifted himself just enough to hover over you. You blinked up at him and bit your lower lip, his expression unlike anything you’d seen before.

“uh…” Sans shifted underneath you. “look, i’m gonna _level_ with ya. this isn’t how i planned to spend the rest of my night.”

It didn’t take very long for the younger of the brothers to catch the hint. He pulled himself away and took your wrist, making sure to get you to your feet, too. He held your hands for a brief moment before he released them, stepping backwards to give you some space.

SHIT! THE KIDS!

“Are you guys okay?!”

Toriel would kill you if you injured one of her kids. You scampered over to where they were to make sure there were no broken limbs or bloodstains, but the both of them just dusted themselves off and went running toward the house shouting for their mom. They were going to tell her all about what just happened. Great.

You flopped back into the sand. Stars glittered above you, reminiscent of the twinkling stones you used to gaze up at when you lived Underground. The skelebros crawled over to join you on either side. Sans laughed so hard that it turned to faint wheezing, whereas Papyrus had tears leaking out of his sockets. Both of them looked like such dorks.

“HEY! WE’RE LEAVING! GET YOUR BUTTS OVER HERE!”

You dusted as much as you could off your dress and walked across the damp grass toward the house. Papyrus and Sans followed you closely, the two of them discussing the chores they had to get done tomorrow. They bounced back so easily. If you’d ended up in that position, crammed in that slide without any way to get out, it would’ve traumatized you. You would’ve seen it as just another reason to hate your body. But they just rolled with the punches and kept smiling through everything.

It was really inspiring.

“How was the episode?”

“Y-you have no idea. I’m going to write a p-post on my blog about it, because there w-was so much to talk about! L-listen, the next day we hang out you h-have to watch it with me and tell me i-if you still like Goro over Ryu!”

Undyne slapped Papyrus on the back and cheered. He bashfully said something back, which prompted a noogie.

“See you later, nerds! Same time next year?”

With the both of them gone, Sans and Papyrus were the next to leave. They didn’t give much for goodbyes, seeing as how they were already exhausted and needed to finish their nighttime rituals before bed.

“GOODNIGHT, BESTIE. I HAD A GREAT TIME!”

“Me too, Paps. Take care of Sans for me, will you? He looks like he’s about to keel over.”

You laughed at the circle of kids that bombarded him with questions.

“YES, YOU ARE RIGHT. SANS! ENOUGH BOONDOGGLING!” Papyrus stomped over and picked him up without any resistance, tossing his brother over his shoulder. “FAREWELL, TORIEL. WE ENJOYED THE FOOD AND THE NOT-AWKWARD DINNER CONVERSATION! WINK!”

You shook your head with a smile. With the door closed behind them, Toriel gestured for you to follow her to the kids’ bedrooms.

“Goodnight, Mom!”

“Love you!”

“Can you turn on the nightlight, please?”

Locques wanted you to come down and hug him. You obliged.

With all four tucked in, Toriel cut the lights off and shut the door behind her, just enough that there was a sliver of light from the hallway trickling in.

“Whew. That was fun.” You headed to the sink, turning the faucet on so you could get the water hot enough to scrub the grime from the plates. “Thanks for having us all over, Tori.”

“Of course. I am always happy when we are together.”

You stole a glance at her. She seemed so content. Like this really was the life she wanted. You would never be happy with what she had; you were just too different. But honestly, you were overjoyed for her. She found her calling and had so much to look forward to. The growth of her kids and school, seeing her friends’ relationships blossom, learning all about the surface and the millions of new books she could read.

“Did you _really_ have to put me on the spot, though?”

“It was fun,” she replied smugly.

“I knew it! You did it on purpose!”

One look at the amusement on her face and you couldn’t help but join her in hysterical laughter. You would have to keep an eye on her after all. Despite the niggling remnants of embarrassment on your brain, you knew that things worked out after all.

Three years, huh? You would persevere and make the next three even better.

**Author's Note:**

>  **question of the day** : which boss fight in undertale made you rage? ~~we don't talk about sans bc NO ONE plays a no mercy run ever~~
> 
> p.s. consider commenting on my fics! when you leave me a note, i frame that shit!!!


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